After Mother’s Day followed Mason’s first birthday on 13 July 2018. As every mother, one envisions their child’s first birthday. I already had screenshots, pictures, photos, cake and decoration inspo saved and Mason hadn’t even been born yet. You do a whole lot of imagining in your head about what your life is going to … More Happy first birthday Masey Moo!
I know, I know, I have been so slack. I am disappointed in myself for not writing more. I have had many of you ask when I will be doing a new post or where have I been. I am sorry. But I have been busy. A good kind of busy. Where do I start. … More Birthday, Bali & Mothers Day
Saunders Godparents approached us a few months after Mason passing….(ugh how bad is the word “passing”….”death” just sounded too harsh and blunt even though it was a good fit) wanting to do something in honor of Mason. Sue and Paul are the most wonderful people I know. Sue is exactly like Kath from Kath & … More Remembering Mason Movie Night under the stars!
December. Christmas is coming. This was me, the Christmas before, having just annouced to our world that I was 13 weeks pregnant. EXCITED. HAPPY. I love Christmas. I mean who doesn’t. I have always been blessed to have had every Christmas filled with lots of love, laughter, happiness, good health, big feasts and gifts. … More My Mason Tree
The week after Mason headed for the stars was such a blur. Time didn’t stop. We didn’t have time to shower. We didn’t have time to eat. We didn’t have time to grieve. We were running on adrenaline. We had to organise the perfect funeral for our beautiful baby boy. You only get one chance … More Another chance, another sign
Mornings and nights are the toughest. It’s when the world feels like it has stopped for you. Finally it stops. Finally it grieves for you and acknowledges that you have lost your baby. The night time silence is ear piercing. Deafening. You toss and turn all night. I still have to sleep with the pillows … More The house looks like a baby lives here but where’s the baby?
The previous blogs I had written literally flowed out of me from heart to keyboard and I was excited to write them. This blog took me a few days, I don’t know if I was subconsciously trying to put it off as once I did write this blog then it would confirm Mason was no … More Seeing stars and saying goodbye
As the days slowly went by Mason was looking better and better, giving us hope that he was on the mend. It was only until the Consultant Pediatrician told us that they had taken Mason off the cooling bed and had started warming him up to normal temperature which would mean if he could, he … More Results, the last day & that ugly green leopard print jumpsuit
Excitement, exhaustion, pain, happiness. So many feelings overwhelmed me on that car trip to the hospital in the early morning of Thursday 13 July 2017. Excitement because I was on the way to the hospital, exhaustion because I had not slept for nearly 24 hours, pain because contractions fucking hurt and happiness because I was … More Labour, delivery & where it all went wrong
I have always been obsessed with babies and children. Not going to lie, but I am quite good…sorry… amazing with kids. They love me and what’s best is they totes GET me. They get my weird voices and crazy faces. My hideous laugh, my wacky ideas. I can be ME with them and not have … More In the beginning, fat lips & that 30th birthday!