After Mother’s Day followed Mason’s first birthday on 13 July 2018. As every mother, one envisions their child’s first birthday. I already had screenshots, pictures, photos, cake and decoration inspo saved and Mason hadn’t even been born yet. You do a whole lot of imagining in your head about what your life is going to … More Happy first birthday Masey Moo!
I know, I know, I have been so slack. I am disappointed in myself for not writing more. I have had many of you ask when I will be doing a new post or where have I been. I am sorry. But I have been busy. A good kind of busy. Where do I start. … More Birthday, Bali & Mothers Day
I am writing this post on 13 December 2017. 5 months since my Mason was born. At work, about returning to work. Happy 5 months my beautiful baby boy. 2 October 2017. 2 months and 13 days. 75 days since Mason passed away in my arms and I was heading off to work. Saunders was relieved … More Back 2 work
Our GP is a lovely, kind, straight to the point, no bullshit kind of guy. While I was pregnant, I had some bad pregnancy insomnia. I would go in stressed and anxious that I hadn’t slept. He pretty much told me that lack of sleep won’t kill me and that I can just get on … More Dougie Days
And the world keeps going. Nothing stops. I still had to do the groceries, go to the post office, go shopping, get a hair cut. I would be out in public thinking do they know? Does my face show that I had lost a baby? Why wont they ask me? Why has everyone slowly stopped … More Double whammy
Friday 28 July 2017. 11am. Mason’s funeral. We didn’t really sleep the night before. Saunders and I chatted in bed in each others arms trying to fully accept that the next day would be our son’s funeral. I got out of bed, had a shower and did my hair and makeup. Put my dress on. … More No fancy title for this one. The funeral
The funeral was approaching and set for Friday, 28 July 2017. On a Monday morning I received a call from Leonie who worked at the funeral home we were using for Mason’s service. Leonie called to say that Mason has been finally taken into her care from being released at the Coroners and had arrived … More Who’s baby is that?
The week after Mason headed for the stars was such a blur. Time didn’t stop. We didn’t have time to shower. We didn’t have time to eat. We didn’t have time to grieve. We were running on adrenaline. We had to organise the perfect funeral for our beautiful baby boy. You only get one chance … More Another chance, another sign
Mornings and nights are the toughest. It’s when the world feels like it has stopped for you. Finally it stops. Finally it grieves for you and acknowledges that you have lost your baby. The night time silence is ear piercing. Deafening. You toss and turn all night. I still have to sleep with the pillows … More The house looks like a baby lives here but where’s the baby?
The previous blogs I had written literally flowed out of me from heart to keyboard and I was excited to write them. This blog took me a few days, I don’t know if I was subconsciously trying to put it off as once I did write this blog then it would confirm Mason was no … More Seeing stars and saying goodbye